Weekly Freekly: Number 0200
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Aloha, bitch! That's all I can say. What can you say to me that's fresher than that? Ninja, I'm coming to you live and direct, from my house, BUT, I was just on the white sands of Waikiki for a Scarface, boss-style wedding playa... In Hawaii! Dolphins were doing backflips, and puffer fish were puffin' on coconut-flavored blunts. The starfish we're chillin' hard as fuck. Starfish move so slow you can't even see them moving, that's how hard starfish chill.
Who got married you ask? I thought you knew. We first broke the news to your eardrums on the ICP hotline about a month ago. See, many of you ninjas fail to understand the freshness of the ICP hotline. It's been around since 19 fuckin' 92. Many times we drop neutron bombs of news on the ICP hotline, and ninjas never even know it. Today, the internet is the place to be for info, there's no doubt about that, but LONG LIVE THE FUCKIN' HOTLINE! Anyhow, the groom is none other than your homie, my homie, our homie, everybody's fuckin' Juggalo homie, Alex Abbiss. The Captain of What's Happenin'. Double A himself. I'm talkin' about the CEO, shinin' like C3P0, the one and only Alex Abbiss. The very ninja of Psychopathic Records. And introducing his lovley missus... The ultra-special, eccentric, extraordinary, the one and only, Ms. Niki Abbiss. Megaton congratulations to them both.
Man, right now I'm checkin' out some fresh-ass Rotten Radio.com And they're playin' all this old school ICP. It's giving my forehead panic-blasts of freshness. You see ninjas, I love all our shit. New, old, right, wrong, it don't matter to me. I love the shit you love and I love the shit you ain't feelin'. I love it all. It's all part of ICP's fresh history so far. So believe me ninjas, chillin' with Mike E. Clark again is fuckin' absolutely fuckin' awesomely dope. You have to understand the whole picture. The timing is perfect and everything just feels so right to be back workin' with Mike again. Just like when ICP and Mike went our separate ways 5 or 6 years ago, we both felt like the timing was perfect for that then as well.
The truth is the truth, and the truth is there was never any stale-ass beef of any kind between ICP and Mike E. Clark and that's fuckin' cool. Both Mike and us are extra happy and proud of that. We never fell out. We've always stayed real respectful of each other no matter what... like some real-ass Juggalo playas. We just all felt like, at that point back then, in like 2000, we had done enough with each other, and both us and Mike wanted to do other flavors. We all wanted to head down new paths at that time. And we did.
Well, a lot has happened since then. Shaggy and I have made music with mad other ninjas since then and all of them we're fuckin' fresh to us. I mean that. Mike P. especially, as well as Fritz The Cat, and Esham. We really learned a lot of new skills from each person. Over the last 5 years ICP took our music down all kinds of new avenues and adventures. As I just said, I love all our music, but I'll tell you this much right freekin' now kid... getting wicked and puttin' it down with Mike E. Clark again, right now, on the mighty fuckin' Tempest album and beyond, sounds like a pretty fuckin' perfectly devastating idea to us. I couldn't be more geeked up and giddy about it all.
We were all sittin' around kickin' it with King Gordy and Prozac one day, who came by the Lotus Pod. We invited them to come hang out at Twiztid's Man's Myth record-release party that next night in Detroit. They showed up and brought with them Mike E Clark. I turned around and there he was, chillin'. We was so geeked to be talking to each other again that we kicked it together all fuckin' night long. From that day on, we been playin' each other our new shits and from there it was on and poppin' again.
Let me tell your brainwaves a thing or fuckin' two. Shaggy and myself are holders of what we call THE SACRED KEY. This key we hold opens any door in the world. It don't matter what kind of door you're talking about. This key we got, can open it with ease. Front doors, jail cells, safes, vaults, bedrooms, secret rooms, bolt locks, whut. You can fuckin' draw a picture of a door on the wall with a crayon and this key will open that bitch. It also can start any car, any boat, airplane, space shuttle, it can even launch nuclear missiles. This is the key to eternal magic, my friends. But the thing is, Shaggy and myself only hold half of this key. Because this Sacred Key is made of two parts. Shaggy and I were givin' half of the key and Mike E. Clark was given the other half of the key. You see, only when we're together as one, do we truly hold the power of The Sacred Key.
Together with Mike E. Clark, we hold the key to open millions and millions of new locked doors, and flex all of our true skills of magic. We bring the Incredible Hulk out of Mike E. Clark, and Mike brings the Mr. Hyde out of ICP. The time is now for us to come together and put our key to work. The first thing we're gonna open is your skulls. These are the days after the mighty 6 Jokers Cards. The dawn of a new era. An unknown era with all new possibilities. Our new shit The Tempest is just now entering the earth's outer stratosphere, and yes... it's on it's way. It is coming so soon, there is no time to be prepared for the absolute madness the storm will bring.
Both Mike and us couldn't wait to get started back together. We had to jump into some shit right now to get us warmed up.
Like perfect timing, ICP's Forgotten Freshness 4 is up to bat. We all thought it would be hella fresh if Mike did some brand new remixes of some of the stuff we did without him, just for purposes of flavor and freshness. Mike jumped right on them and started beatin' 'em down. He remixed "Juggalo Homies" off Shangri-La, and "CPKs" off Hell's Pit.
Also, as if that ain't enough devastation for your tiny little pea-brain to handle, we will now step on and smear it. Because also featured in FF4 is the very 1st brand new ICP/Mike E. Clark song in over five years, and it's been a long-ass nickel. But that shit is finally here for your earortas. The song is called "Wicked Hellaween" and it's also this year's Hallowicked free giveaway CD in Detroit. All y'all other cities get the bone on the free CD tip, sorry.
Special guests on FF4, including the guest on the extra Hallowicked disc (which has all 13 Hallowicked songs) are as follows: Your mother, Fresh Kid Ice, Fish 'N' Grits, Kottonmouth Kings, Mack 10, Tech N9ne, Vanilla Ice, Bone Thugs, MC Breed, and a whole slew of Hatchet Fam Swingas. So CHOP! FF4 gots all never-heard-before ICP songs, including songs that never made it on to Shangri-La and Hell's Pit for whatever reasons. Plus Mike E. Clark even found two songs that were recorded way back in 1993, and have never been heard before, anywhere, until now on FF4.
And much love to Strange Music and Tech N9ne for some extra-special freshness on FF4. You see, there is also a brand fuckin new ICP/Tech N9ne song that was just recorded this month for FF4 called "Mad House". Plus FF4 features never heard before skits, intros, and other freshness dating all the way back to Riddlebox as well as a lot more dope ass never heard before, dug up and forgotten shit.
Several ninjas cried about Shaggy 2 Dope's album getting delayed AGAIN. Look we understand that it's been delayed a few times, but, I mean what's ten years? Relax, because it's back on track with a release date yet again. This time is final. February 21st will be the day that Fuck The Fuck Off will finally drop. I put my balls on that promise. Shaggy is back at work on it, right now. As your eyeballs are reading this, he is in the studio. And guess who's in there working with him. Mike E. Clark is, that's who. Mike's got some seriously dope new tracks to add to Shaggy's already fresh album. And now that FF4 is off to the pressing plant, Shaggy's shit is RIGHT NOW. It would have been out sooner than February 21st, but the entire music industry shuts down for the Holidays. Pressing plants and everything. So we lose a month right there. February 21st is the soonest we could bless your heads with some Fuck The Fuck Off.
Drive-By is finally here. We thought we'd have it for y'all on the Twiztid/ABK tour, but I fucked that up. I spoke too quick. Them CD's took too long to come back. The album should be available through Hatchet Gear by the end of next week. Once again. Listen, we put up that free song to show ya how for real this Drive-By shit is. Right now that CD is everybody's favorite shit up at the Hatchet. I got my Ponys on right now, bitch. They were only 35 bucks too. And they're fresh because I'm representin' Drive-By every time I put my Ponys down. Deep bass and fresh voices. I love the whole feel of Drive-By. It's some real, wayback shit from Killa and Blaze.
You wanna talk about the Soopa Villainz? Go to Soopavillainz.com because Mr. Heart has the debut of his brand new newsletter called "From the Heart" going up on Monday. And he's got fat news on a lot of shit that's going down with the Soopa Villainz all before Christmas! Shows, videos, new releases all coming before Santa even puts his blew-out socks on. SV is on some other shit. I seen Faygoluvers.net showing love with that fresh SV design, that's the fuckin' shit.
Yo, this lil' book came out about ICP. We ain't got any idea who put it out or anything. Some company someplace. I wanna tell you how I feel about it. Coming from me, one of the guys in the group, that shit blew my forehead back two more inches. That's why my forehead's so big now. I'm always getting my wig pushed back from shit. That shit is fuckin' awesome. That's how I feel. Plus all them fresh-ass photos I ain't never seen before. I read it, and yeah, all their info came from my book, but so fuckin' what. That's the real information anyway, so who cares where the source is. I think that book is fuckin' fresh to me and we all felt real flattered by it. I mean, yeah they're tryna get paid off us, but its fresh that they would pick us to invest in. I don't know how everybody out there feels about it but I fuckin' love that book and recommend that shit to everybody for the pictures alone.
Wrestling News
Well, the Rude Boy turned on me. It all happened at an IWA East Coast show in West Virginia. Rudy was wrestling Mad Man Pondo and lost like a girl. Rudy's going into his emotional thank you, goodbye speech when suddenly Sabu hit the ring and starts stabbin' Rudy half to death. Rudy got to bleed twice in one match. That's when I hit the ring to everybody's surprise and make the save all fresh like. But after I chase off Sabu, I'm going up each corner getting my cheap props when Rude Boy nailed me with a chair shot that I oversold for like ten minutes. That bastard. I'm going back to West Virginia to fight Rudy in a steel cage on November 15th. And guess who the special guest referee is... Shaggy 2 fuckin' Dope. It's gonna be fun because Rudy thinks I'm gonna lock up and put him in a head lock or something. He thinks we're gonna wrestle a match, but I'm gonna beat his ass for-real style instead. That's all I gotta say at this moment in time about that right there. That and Rudy's really my boy so don't get your thong twisted around your nuts.
Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, that's it y'all. I wanna give a shout out to all the people everywhere reading this. I love y'all, Shaggy loves y'all, the Hatchet loves y'all. But I especially do because you read this shit right here. Your still reading my shit right now. As we speak right now in this very moment in time you are reading my shit. Thank you ninjas and much Clown Love.
Peace and I'm out like Gilligan.
